Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?
----Because its head is so far from its body.
Who wears the biggest hat in the world?
----The man with the biggest head in the world.
Teacher: "Raymond, in what battle was Admiral Lord Nelson killed?"
Raymond: "His last one, sir."
Teacher: "Sarah,what was the first thing James the first did on coming to the throne?"
Sarah: "He sat down, miss."
Cooking teacher: "Tom, how can we prevent food from going bad?"
Tom: "By eating it, miss."
A："Ticket inspector, why did you punch a hole in my ticket?"
B: "So you can go through, sir."
A："How short can girls' skirts get?"
B: "No matter how short, they will always be above two feet."
Father: "Great Scott! How you look!"
Jimmie: "Yes, pa, I fell in a mudhole."
Father: "What! And with your new pants on?"
Jimmie: "Yes. I didn't have time to take them off."
Father(meaningly): "Who is the laziest member of your class, tommy?"
Tommy: "I don't know, Pa."
Father: "I should think you should know. When all the others are industriously studying or writing their lessons, who is it that sits idly in his seat and watches the rest, instead of working himself?"
Tommy: "The teacher."
Teacher: "Arthur,if you had three apples and ate one,how many would you have?"
Arthur: "Yes. Two outside and one inside."
Q: What's the difference between a monkey and a flea?
A:Amonkey can have fleas，but a flea can't have monkeys.
Q: Which is the strongest creature in the world?
A:The snail.It carries its house on its back.
Q: What do people do in a clock factory?
A:They make faces all day.
31. What wears a cap but has no head?
32. What rises in the morning and waves all day?
33. What is an astronomer?(天文學家)?
A night watchman with a college education.
34. How can you tell clocks and watches are shy?
Because they always have their hands in front of their faces.
35. What is wind?
Air in a hurry.
36. What comes after the letter "A"?
All the other letters.
37. What starts with a T, ends with a T, and is full of T?
38. What word can you make shorter by adding to it?
39. What person does every man take his hat off to?
40. Why does the boy carry a ladder to the school?
Because he wants to go to high school.
41. What can you swallow that can also swallow you?
42. What's the difference between a hill and a pill?
A hill is hard to get up and a pill is hard to get down.
43. Why is it useless to send a letter to Washington?
Because he's dead.
44. A doctor and a lawyer loved the same girl. The lawyer went away for a week and gave the girl seven apples before he left. Why?
Because an apple a day keeps the doctor away.
45. What will you do if a man-eating tiger is running after you?
Nothing. Because I'm a woman.
46. What always travels on foot?
47. Where can happiness always be found?
In the dictionary.
48. What is higher without a head than with a head?
49. Why don't you advertise for your lost dog?
He can't read.
50. On which side does a bird have the most feathers?